Meditation One: Loneliness

Family is a gift of loving people; to be without them is to truly be alone.

But what is loneliness?

Sometimes, I wonder if such a thing exists at all. Other times, I realize that that's all there is. Loneliness, is a psychological state of being, where, regardless of the world surrounding you, you can never be content with what you have - because it feels like nothing.

Loneliness is like the number one. It's kind of the feeling you get when you take one thing, and pick it out because of what it is that makes it the one of its kind.

People in the rare objects fields will have used, several times, the phrase "it's one of a kind." Well what about people?

I think that to make a person "one of a kind" is to make that person a lonely person.

Being alone has been depicted in so many works, that it seems almost taken for granted that loneliness is a disease which no one wants to catch.

Loneliness is often shown as a way for someone of hiding something. Maybe it's what they have the potential to be, that makes them freaks, and which ostracizes them from society. Maybe it's what makes them weak which makes people laugh and talk. Or maybe it's just because they don't know what it's like to be with anyone.

Actually, I've been thinking myself about what it feels like for me to be alone, and I guess it helps me get some thoughts in my head processed. But then again, for me, it isn't an in-born psychological state of being.

With a lot of my friends, I know that at one point, they've been lonely. At one point, everyone must be alone. Understanding that is part of learning.

Because of loneliness, we can learn what it means to have other people, what it means to love, what it means to be willing to give.

Some of the most serious cases of loneliness are the ones who grew up as orphans. I remember the story of young Albertine in Rwanda. As a girl caught in the midst of a civil war, she had no where to go, and found refuge in a strange man from a different society, and spoke a different tongue. During the fighting, her family and the region in which they had lived had been caught in the crossfire. She was left to fend for herself, as her mother was killed, father not even known about.

Loneliness, though, does bring out the best in people. It did in Albertine's case. Everyone she met was inspired by her story, like Brooke Fraser, whose 2006 album release was dedicated to Albertine and her story.

In some ways, living a life of loneliness is bad, but it's also enriching, if you take it moderately. Loneliness teaches us about the importance of having other people around, about the importance of hope, and the importance of love above all. Without it, we would always be lonely.